Fandom: CSI: NY
Personaggi: Don Flack, Stella Bonasera
Set In Time: Inizio stagione 7, quindi SPOILER, perché in Italia non è ancora andata in onda. Nella fiction si fa riferimento agli accadimenti dell'episodio 06x08: Cuckoo's Nest.
Note: Fiction in inglese; one-shot (1221 parole, secondo Open Office)
Disclaimer: Non riesco a capire perché, ma i personaggi non sono miei. Non è mio nemmeno lo show. Faccio tutto solo ed esclusivamente per la gloria.
Buona lettura (se qualcuno legge *ficcy-writer in crisi*)
Flack has never been that kind of guy. He has never written a love letter – not even to Jess -, let alone a sort of friendship letter. He can't
really understand why some people have to write down their feelings.He knows the importance of them, of course he does, but he isn't able
to express them with tons and tons of words.
So,he doesn't know what to do. He looks at the watch, frowning. Two hours and then everything will be over. Another woman is going to walk out of his life and he doesn't have the slightest idea how he can say how important she has been – she still is – to him.
He sighs, frustrated, grabbing a pen.
He stops. Pathetic.
He grunts lightly. Too impersonal.
“My dear Stella...”
He laughs. Too granny-style.
He shakes his head. Untrue.
He knows he'll be in trouble, he just can't let her leave without almost trying to explain how much their friendship has meant to him. And he doesn't even know how to start the letter.
He stretches in the chair, looking around.
She has always been there for him, it'll be so weird and lonely without her. He thinks at the first time they met and a laughter escapes his lips. She has always been one of his favorites. They have shared something strong and inexplicable, nor love, nor passion, but neither simple friendship. It was something more and it's gonna end. Of course, she'll call from New Orleans, but it won't be the same.
Flack closes his eyes, breathing slowly. And he remembers.
You OK?”, Stella is standing in front of him, holding the door, preventing him to close it.
He nods, looking sad.
“Can I come in?”
“Of course”, he opens the door fully, letting her in.
Sat on his couch, she looks around: His apartment seems defeated: “You didn't answer...”
He chuckles without joy, shrugging, “I'm good, you know”
“You're a terrible liar, the worst liar I have ever seen in fact”
“And I'm pretty sure you didn't have that bruise on your forehead yesterday. What happened?”
He glances at her: “Mac told you something?”
She laughs: “Who, Mac? No! I'm a detective, you know, I'm trained to notice details...”
He says nothing.
“Not even a snarky remark of yours? Now, I'm getting worried... sit there”, she pats the spot next to her. He obliges slowly, almost uncertain.
“Well... are you at least looking at me in the eye?”, she asks raising one of her eyebrow.
“I'm fine, OK?”
She's not clearly believing him.
“OK, something happened on the train, but it's over now and I'm not talking about it”
“Don't Don me. I know you're worried, I know Mac's worried, I know everybody is worried, but it's not worth it”, he stops abruptly. He looks down and starts chewing on his lips.
Stella is confused and a little shocked: “Wait, wait... where did all this come from? Are you implying you are not worth our worries? Please, don't do this! You are so damn important, Flack!”, her voice is higher, but it doesn't seem to affect him.
The woman sighs deeply. She can't let this go.
“I don't know what happened on that train and I don't wanna know if you don't want to explain. But you can't let Jess's death destroys you. What am I gonna do without you?”
He finally looks at her, the despair in her voice hitting him.
“I... I'm sorry, Stell. I've already apologized to Mac and I should apologize to you, too and...”
“Stop, Don. I know you're sorry. Apologies accepted. What it's more important now is that you understand you're not alone. I'm your friend, you know? If you want to talk, I'll be there. If you want to break down, I'll be there. If you want to sit in silence, I'll be there”, she studies him for a few seconds, “Let's make a deal”
He frowns, “A deal?”
“Yes... if you're feeling, I don't know...”
“... like shit?”
She grins, feeling relieved: “Yeah, like shit, I'll be there to offer you free hugs”
“Free hugs?”, he really doesn't know why but he can't help smiling.
“Never been strongly and lovingly hugged in a tragic moment? Guess not... ah, I know, men don't do hugs”
“You're missing a wonderful act. Don't believe me, do you? Ok, comes here”, she opens her arms.
He's doubtful, she can see it, but he does as she asked. Couple of instants later he's engulfed into her arms. He can feel her hands stroking his shoulders; he can smell her perfume; he can feel her heartbeat. She was right: He's already feeling better. He doesn't even want to move.
Flack slowly relaxes, feeling the tension evaporating from his body. He's less pained, the toll almost crushing him being taken away by Stella's arms. Eyes closed, he listens to her breath. It's peaceful, soothing. In a second he's a little child again, and Stella is now his mother, comforting him after a nightmare. He inspires deeply letting the air filling completely his lungs before expiring.
He doesn't know how much time has passed but when Stella breaks the hug he has almost fallen asleep.
He opens his mouth to say something Flack-style, but she raises her hands to block him.
“Don't say anything. I know. It worked perfectly, didn't it? But we surely don't want to ruin your manly image, so it's better you don't speak”, she's smiling warmly, exactly how a good friend is supposed to do.
He smiles back: It has been a while since he felt light and at ease, since he felt almost himself again. It's kind of weird.
“So, I guess it's a deal...”
“You can say it. Whenever you need me, I'll be there”
And now she's leaving New York. What a stupid has he been! She's just changing her job, not abandoning him. His heart knows she would keep her promise to be at his side in time of need. She is Stella, the motherly one of their team.
He shakes his head, brushing quickly away a tear he doesn't even know was on his cheek.
He looks down at the sheet.
“Stell, thank you for being there. The Big Easy is gonna be a blast, you know?
He stands and walk to the lab. He joins her in Mac's office and, unnoticed, hides the folded sheet in her purse. He puts up his funny, joking front and greets her. And then, she's gone.
Flack is finally at home when his phone beeps signaling a new message. He'd be lying if he said he wasn't waiting for it.
“Don, our deal is always valid. Call me when you need your free hug. I'll be there no matter what. You are a great friend. Remember: You're not alone. S.”
He smiles. He looks outside the window, finding the evening light as calming as Stella's arms.
Goodbye, Stell. And Thank you.